[x]

Hurts Like HeavenOh. My.
God, it hurts like heaven;
Longing for all your affection,
Every bit of your attention,
You're a divine intervention.
In this life that's turned to hell.

I can't help it when I reminisce,
In moments that are just like this,
I remember when we had our kiss,
And now how much I really miss,
You...

The times when we weren't separated,
Were the best memories that I've created,
To reunite is long awaited,
I feel like I'm incarcerated,
In my own personal hell.

I can't help it when I think of you...
I hope one day we'll say "I do."
But for now I have to struggle through,
Until the day I get to you...

It won't be long, lov

Acceptance.Friends all stand in front of me...
Laughing, joking carelessly...
I hide my arms so they can't see...
What it is I've done to me...

And though I try to hang around...
They often leave me feeling lost...
What will it take just to be found?
How much more will my joy cost..?

('Cause I don't live, I just survive)
(Among the crowd, I'm ostracized)
(I can not be indemnified)
(I fell too hard, I broke this time)

My parents always yell at me...
Like I won't get it unless they scream...
But I never do know what they mean...
Why do they have to smother me?!

I've got my back pressed to the fences...
I'm sorry that I'm such a hinderance

But Nobody KnowsI can't tell my

Tears from the rain
The hurt from the pain
My life from this game
It's all just the same

And it hurts me so badly
That you're so mad at me
I can't stop me from breaking
My hands are still shaking

Knees are so weak
I can't stay on my feet
So I fall to the ground
And I hope to be found

It's this feeling inside me
That I've never missed
It corrodes and divides me
Puts scars on my wrist

It controls and divides me
Fuels the fire inside me
Destroys all I make
Creates all my hate

I'm not that one in a million
The diamond in the rough
I'm just one more person
Who's finally had enough

Of hiding from hurt
And d

Wonder.Do you fear your own death?
Is it hard to conceive?
Draw in your last breath, then-
Your last breath will leave.

Isn't it strange to think,
That there's a timer above your head?
A countdown you can't see,
That finishes when you're dead.

Don't you ever wonder,
What it'll be like when you're gone?
I bet the world will keep on spinning.
There will be another dawn.

But the harsh reality behind it-
We're all going to die.
There's no reason to try to fight it
Not even to question why.

It makes me wish that I could have a little more to give,
Because I'm not afraid of how I'll die...

I'm afraid of how I'll
Live...

If Ever I Lost YouWhat weighs on your mind?
What's taking up your time?
You tell me not to worry and you swear you're really fine

Please open up to me
Tell me of your fears
You know I'll kiss the scars and I'll wipe away your tears

Don't keep it to yourself
You know you're not alone
I couldn't live my life without you ever coming home

I'd be so lost inside
I wouldn't recognize
The person that I see in the reflection of your eyes

Just tell me you're okay, and that you love me too
I don't know what I'd do
If ever I lost you…

Optimistically PessimisticThere's broken
Then there's shattered to the core
There's saying I don't care
Or I don't love you anymore

There's hopeless
And theres frustratingly out of reach
There are lessons left to learn
But those lessons they'll never teach

There are promises
Then there are hollow and empty lies
There are moments that you treasure
And moments you want to die

There's lonliness
And there's tired of going on
There is waiting for forever
But forever will never come...

Missing Pieces.I am a missing piece. Something that someone needs.
But at the same time, I feel so incomplete.
I’ve wandered way too far, wondered for far too long
Am I a missing piece? Or a piece that won’t belong?

Is it possible I’m damaged and not missing at all?
That I’m just as dysfunctional as everybody else?
Pretending to be perfect never softened a single fall.
But neither did admitting that you’re broken and flawed.

A broken missing piece. Is that all I’m meant to be?
There is no master plan that includes the likes of me.
Being all alone, it’s a hurt that will not cease.
A hundred thousand years from now

Savior.I have this darkness deep inside me,
It's what influenced this writing.
I can't control it, I can't fight it,
Barely know it, and can't hide it.

I'm just a mess with no ambition;
So much less than I envisioned.
How much more can I endure?
I don't know, I'm not too sure...

I'm not myself when I'm alone,
And yet I find I'm on my own.
I'm like a lock without a key,
There is no perfect fit for me!...

You're not alone.
Don't think like that.
Pick your head up.
I believe in you.
You can do it.
I love you...

Are you here to prove me wrong?
To make me see the brighter dawn?
With this darker side, this part of me,
How can you love

To Be NumbI gaze through the glass
To the last rays of light
And the long shadows cast
As dusk turns into night

Hands cling to the chain link
Still struggle to stand
I know what you may think
And I know what I am

A broken man
Still stealing these breaths
Because I can

I tried to hold on
If not but for your sake
But you walked away
Left my heart here to ache

Now it just
Reluctantly beats
It's this feeling inside me
And my heart is its keep

It's a feeling that
Is known only to some
Not everyone knows
What it's like to be numb...

HurricaneI don't really know
How all of this came to be
When I already know
She can do better than me

I feel like she's the desert
And whenever I hold her hand
I realize that makes me
Nothing more than a grain of sand

I can't help but ask myself
How is it that she's with me?
I'm just a mess when I'm alone
And I'm fucking up constantly

She's amazing...
In every way, shape, and form
Like the calm of the night
Or like the eye of a storm

(And if that storm were to break...)

I always have the thought
That if people were rain
l would be just a drop
And she'd be the hurricane...

I'm A Mess..I push on through this life still wandering blindly
Hoping that somehow somebody is gonna find me

But I'm lost
And my body is freezing
My breaths are growing ragged
And my heart beat is ceasing

I can't remember
A time when we weren't together
And I'm really starting to miss

What we were

And I miss our forever
I had to try
I had lie
Just to put forth the effort

I'm following in tracks that you left behind
But as I press on they're getting harder to find

So why
Why did you leave me stranded
Lonely and empty handed
My blood is running cold
And I don't even understand it

But you
You don't know what you have done
Shut me o

I'll Get To You..I see you standing there
I know you're fighting back the tears
You think that no one cares
And that nobody ever hears

Your silent cries
(Your asking why)
Your quiet lies
(Your alibis)

You stand aside and so alone
I wish that you had only known
That it's not fair please dry your tears
I'll always be the one right here

To hush your cries
(To answer why)
To make things right
(To say you're fine)

I see that you're still by yourself
And you still stand with no one else
But even though I'm not right there
Please don't think that I don't care

Because I do
(And this I swear)
I'll get to you
(No matter where...)

Waiting.Just another lost soul
Still wondering who I am
Wondering
How do I fill this hole
That you left when we began

Searching for something
That I've barely ever known
Somewhere I belong
A place to call my home

No...

Home was with you
Wrapped in your arms all day
And I know it was you
Who pulled me out of harms way

But now I'm on my own
I really need you here
Tell me, where did you go
I'll make it perfectly clear

I'm never moving on
But I'm never looking back
I'm waiting right here for you
And that's a matter of fact.

Emotionless KissIt's not like I can even fight it so why do I still attempt..
To drag myself out of my self created lament..?
I tried to make things right but I can't force out your repent...
You're standing right next to me so why do you feel so distant?!

I only wish
To take your hand
Pull you in close
And do everything that I can

To keep you
I wanted to make you mine
Though I waited and waited
You never gave me a sign

It's not like I try to hide it so why is it that you ignore me?
I've got no one to confide in and you won't even reassure me...
Maybe when I'm gone you'll finally start missing me...
It's strange that when I'm dead how you'll f

So Nobody Can TellI'm not that one in a million
Or the diamond in the rough
I'm just another person
Who's finally had enough

I can't stand it any longer
All the pain and misery
I can't be any stronger
This is all that I can be

I try so hard to fight it
And it's something I've never missed
I try so hard to hide it
These scars upon my wrist

Consequences from
Another day of hidden pain
But how much of that
Can one heart sustain

Without feeling all alone
And though I look alive
I'm so cold and on my own
I'm really dead inside

Somebody make it better
Please come and take all the hurt
Don't want to be like this forever
This isn't what I deserv

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More from ~Invoking

The Best For LastYou broke all of my dreams
All of my hope
All of the things
I held so close
Like memories

And no one ever sees
How much I'm hurting inside
I scream so silently
A single tear falls from my eye

You broke all of me that's sacred
And I thought those days had passed
Just let me ask one question...

Why did you save my heart for last?

ConflictionWas it your intention
To never mention
Any of these confessions
The tension
So easily torn
With another wave
Of broken redemption

Confliction
A matter of contradiction
And worse, inhibitions

Of the heart
Tell you the truth
And watch you fall apart
Or keep the lie a secret
Hidden in the dark

Complete and utter destruction
Of something that was still
Under construction
It's somethin

When you can wake up
To the sensation
Of incarceration
In a self created isolation

Am I Finally Good Enough?I wiped away your tears
Stayed up with you all night
I fought away your fears
To make sure you were alright

I was the one
Who always stood by your side
And
I was always there
To be the one you confide in

I moved mountains
When nobody else could
I held you in my arms
When nobody else would

Am I finally good enough
To be worthy of your love...?

Or is there something more
That you're still waiting for...?

Thanks To YouBreaking my heart
Like it's something you own
You tear it apart
Can't you leave me alone

I'm done with all this
I'm finished with you
See this cut on my wrist
This blood is on you

You left me so broken
And shattered to the core
I'll never be open
I've closed all of my doors

I hide in my dreams
But they're tormented too
I can't find a safe place
All because of you

Let me have peace
Please let me live life
I've fallen to my knees
And I cry here tonight

All thanks to you
I can no longer live right
Just go through the motions
Just trying to survive

My Last BreathBreathe in
Slowly
Heart beat
Going

Taking my last breath
My last breath of air
Promise me someone
Just promise you care

Falling one last time
Collapse to the ground
I tried to hold on but
You're way to far now

Taking my last breath
My last breath of life
Please somebody promise
Just say I'm alright

Breathe in
Slowly
Eyes are
Closing

Everything To MeCan't you see that you are everything to me
Everything to me

I hate the way I feel
When I see you in the halls
Like nothing else is real
Only you and me, these walls
Then I come back to reality
As I hear your girlfriends call
It's a crushing blow to me
I'm trying so hard not to fall

I hate just standing to the side
Only wishing you were mine
I hate feeling like I'm so confined
Why do you have to be so blind
I can't make it anymore obvious
Than I've already made this
I fucking love you more than she does
I already know of this because

You are everything to me
Baby, can't you see
You are all I really need
I want to be your

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Submitted: March 11, 2012
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Waking Up

by ~Invoking, Mar 11, 2012, 7:35:52 PM
Literature / Poetry / Emotional / Free Verse

I wake up again in the middle of the night
Cold sweat dripping I don't know if I'm alright
Cause it's the millionth time
That I've dreamt you were mine

But now I see
It's only me
With no one else
I'm by myself...

I can hear my heartbeat echo off these walls
As I wander aimlessly through these desolate halls
I keep thinking that I'm hearing your desperate call
But that's just me pretending trying so hard not to fall

I listen to the wind as it whispers by me
But the words that it speaks aren't registering
I listen to the rain as it pours to the ground
I'm looking for you but you're nowhere around

I really fucking hate being alone
Always looking like I've got somewhere to go
When the truth of it all is that I have no home
But I lie say I like being on my own

I'm stumbling down the side of an empty street
Struggling just to stand, to stay on my feet
I can't seem to forget you or this defeat
I can feel the world around me begin to sink

I'm looking at the horizon and a setting sun
Wondering how drunk I gotta be to point this gun
To the side of my head
Pull the trigger I'm dead

Will that, fix me?
Will it, make you miss me?
Am I still by myself?
Alone here, with no one else?

I'm laying down staring at the ceiling and a spinning fan
Wondering why I'm still feeling like a broken man
Why I'm still here stealing every breath that I can
Wishing I could be with you walking hand in hand

I'm drowning in the middle of a deep blue sea
Caught in a storm raging violently
But that's not stopping me
Cause I swear I can see you
My eyes disbelieve but it just has to be true
Then they flicker open, it was just a dream

So. Then. I...

Wake up again in the middle of the night
Cold sweat dripping I don't know if I'm alright
Cause it's the millionth time
That I've dreamt you were mine

But now I see
It's only me
With no one else
I'm by myself...