Shop Mobile More Submit  Join Login

:iconinvoking: More from Invoking

Featured in Collections

Words by ArikaRinkishika

Literature by DragonsChest

Favourite Poetry and verse by Supach

More from DeviantArt


Submitted on
June 4


33 (who?)
Some days I can’t even get out of bed
So I lay there in the shadows with the voices in my head
And they torment me with memories and things I had to choose
Somehow it ended up no matter what it is I lose

But I put on my best smile and nobody can tell
I’m not as happy as I seem, in fact, I’m doing well
I stare myself down in the mirror and thought I’d at least try
To make it through another day I tell another lie

I’m alright…

That’s exactly what I’ll say if anybody asks
I’m alright; I’m okay with living life behind these masks
Nobody has to worry because I’m obviously faking
I’m permanently stuck in the moment before breaking

I’m a pile of emotions all cluttered on the floor
With so much weight attached I can’t hold it anymore
But I’ve learned to live a lie and nobody can tell
That I’m just about to fall apart, In fact, I’m doing well.
Never been better.
Add a Comment:
prettyflour Featured By Owner 6 days ago  Hobbyist General Artist

Hey there,


Prettyflour here on behalf of :iconpoeticalcondition: with the critique you requested.


I think you picked a great title for this poem- it’s not super obvious but fits perfectly. You’ve created something that I feel will pull at the heart strings of readers- you expressed feelings and situations that I think most will find familiar, and THAT makes this poem relatable.


Technique wise, I like the way you formatted this- the big, bold ‘I’m alright…’ breaks up the flow in between stanzas and puts a nice emphasis in the mask of being okay when the subject really isn’t. Also, I think you did a wonderful job with the rhyming.


Overall, an emotional, relatable poem- a good read for sure.  Thank you for sharing your words!

NemoX7 Featured By Owner Jun 28, 2014   Writer
I'm sure there are many who can relate to this neatly crafted poem. Well done! :)
CrazyMai Featured By Owner Jun 8, 2014  Student Writer
I can relate it to so much. I have these days as well.
Very well written ♡
OreoApocalypse Featured By Owner Jun 4, 2014  Hobbyist General Artist
I hate to sound like everyone else, but this describes me a lot. More than not, this is how i feel. It's beautiful the way you put it into words
Invoking Featured By Owner Jun 4, 2014  Hobbyist Writer
It's okay. It just means that others who feel that way know that there are others like them.
GoldenNocturna Featured By Owner Jun 4, 2014  Student Writer
I feel this way myself from time to time. I find it very upsetting that people rarely notice, though--I can't tell if it's because they don't care or if I'm that good an actor. I'm kinda glad that I'm not alone in feeling this, though.
Invoking Featured By Owner Jun 4, 2014  Hobbyist Writer
Yeah, sometimes I think I deserve an oscar for how well I seem to act. But it's alright. You're never really alone.
GoldenNocturna Featured By Owner Jun 4, 2014  Student Writer
Loti, an Oscar. That's a good one. Thanks.
Supach Featured By Owner Jun 4, 2014  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
Ooh so good,:clap:  this just describes me perfectly.
Invoking Featured By Owner Jun 4, 2014  Hobbyist Writer
Thanks :meow:
Add a Comment: